Christmas Messages for Son, Daughter and In-Laws: 46 Notes

Writing a Christmas card to your own child is strange the first time. For years you signed their cards for them; now they have an address of their own, maybe a partner, maybe children, and Christmas has to be shared. The best messages from a parent do two things at once: they say how proud you are of the person your son or daughter has become, and they leave the door wide open. Below you’ll find messages for sons, for daughters, for the in-laws who joined the family, and for children spending Christmas far from home.

Christmas messages for son

For a son of any age, from the teenager who sleeps until noon to the man who now carves the turkey.

To our son: you were the first one awake every Christmas for years. We hope this one is worth getting up early for.
Merry Christmas, son. Watching you grow into a kind, patient man has been the best present of our lives.
Dear Tom, I found your old letter to Santa in the attic, spelling mistakes and all. It’s on the fridge now. Merry Christmas.
Son, thank you for driving through the snow to get here every year. We know it’s a long road. We never take it for granted.
To my boy, who will always be my boy, however tall he gets: Merry Christmas, with a hug you can’t escape.
Merry Christmas to the son who fixes my phone, my computer and my mood. Love, Mom.
We’re proud of you every day of the year, but at Christmas we get to say it out loud. Merry Christmas, son.
Dad says the tree stand is broken again. Come early, bring your toolbox and stay for dinner.

Christmas messages for daughters

For a daughter, or daughters plural if you’re writing one card to several.

To our daughter: every Christmas tradition we love, you somehow made better. Merry Christmas, darling.
Merry Christmas to my girls, who still fight over who gets to put the angel on top of the tree.
Dear Clare, you’ve grown into someone I’d choose as a friend even if I hadn’t been lucky enough to be your mother. Happy Christmas.
My darling daughter, you were born in winter and you’ve been warming this house ever since.
To the daughter who still calls me first when something goes right: thank you. Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas, sweetheart. I hope this year you get the long lie-in, the good chocolate and the window seat.
Dear daughter, I’ve kept every ornament you ever made us. The tree is covered in paper snowflakes and very old glitter.
You’ve had a big year, and you did it with such courage. Merry Christmas, from your very proud parents.

What to write in a Christmas card for daughter

When she deserves more than a line. A memory, what you see in her now, and a wish for the year ahead.

Dear Anna, I keep thinking about the Christmas you were six and insisted on wrapping every present in the house, including the ones for you. You haven’t changed: you still give more than you take. I’m so proud of you, and I hope this Christmas brings you as much as you bring the rest of us. All my love, Mom.
Dear Megan, your first Christmas in the new job, the new city, the new apartment. I know it’s been a lot. You’ve handled every bit of it, and we couldn’t be prouder. The kettle’s on whenever you need it. Merry Christmas, Dad.

For a son or daughter far from home

For the child who moved across the country or across the ocean, and the parents who still set a place for them.

The house is decorated, the cake is iced and your stocking is hanging on the mantel, right where it’s always been.
We know you can’t come home this Christmas. We’ll save you a plate and we’ll save you a cracker, and we’ll pull it together next year.
When your flight lands next week, we’ll be at the arrivals gate with a sign, a scarf and the dog.
It’s snowing back home and the river has frozen at the edges. Your father keeps saying how much you’d love it.
You’re making a life we’re so proud of, even if it’s five thousand miles away. Merry Christmas, love.
Call when you wake up on Christmas morning. It’ll be lunchtime here, and we’ll all crowd round the phone.
Wherever you spend Christmas, you take a bit of this house with you. Merry Christmas, from the people who miss you most.

Christmas messages for daughter and son-in-law

For one card to the couple, especially in the years when Christmas is split between two families.

To our daughter and son-in-law: wherever you spend Christmas Day, you’re always home here. Love to you both at Christmas.
Merry Christmas, Lucy and Mark. Thank you for coming to us this year. We know it means sharing, and we’re grateful.
Watching the two of you build a home together has been one of the joys of our year. Have a beautiful first Christmas in it.
To our favorite couple: may your Christmas be cozy, your in-laws well behaved and your oven reliable.
We hope you have a wonderful Christmas with Mark’s family, and we’ll see you both for the New Year. Save us some leftovers.

Christmas messages for daughter-in-law

For the woman your son married, and who has become part of the family.

To our daughter-in-law: thank you for bringing so much warmth to our family. Merry Christmas.
We didn’t just gain a daughter-in-law; we gained someone who finally beats your father at cards. Merry Christmas, Priya.
Thank you for making our son so happy, and for making us feel welcome in your home. Have the happiest Christmas.
You’ve made our Christmases bigger, louder and better. We’re so glad you’re one of us.

Christmas messages for son-in-law

For the man your daughter married, who now has his own seat at your table.

To our son-in-law: thank you for loving our daughter, and for always helping with the dishes. Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas, James. You’ve been family for years now, and we still can’t believe how lucky we got.
To the son-in-law who carved the turkey last year without being asked: the job is yours for life. Happy Christmas.
We’re glad you married into this noisy family, and gladder still that you stayed. Merry Christmas.

For a son or daughter with children of their own

For the year your children become the ones filling stockings at midnight.

Now you know what Christmas Eve really involves. Hang in there, and get some sleep before dawn.
Watching you make Christmas for your own children is like watching our own memories play back in a new house.
Merry Christmas to the best mom and dad our grandchildren could ask for. You make us very proud.
We’re coming on the 26th to take the children sledding so the two of you can have a quiet morning. Merry Christmas.

A first Christmas away from home

For a son or daughter spending their first Christmas at college, in a new job abroad, or in their own place.

Your first Christmas in your own home. Make it yours, and call us when the tree is up.
It’s strange to wrap your presents and post them rather than put them under the tree. We miss you more than we’ll admit.
Your first Christmas abroad. Eat everything, see everything, and tell us all about it when you call.
The house is quieter this year without you in it, but we’re so proud of where you are. Merry Christmas, love.

Closings for a card to your children

Closings

With pride and love, your old mom and dad,
With love from the old house,
Always here, always yours,
From the people who love you first and most,

Make it personal

Tell them what you see. “You’re a wonderful father” or “you’ve become so brave” may be the sentence they keep. Grown-up children rarely hear it said plainly.

Mention the in-laws by name. A son-in-law or daughter-in-law who sees their own name feels included, not added on.

Don’t make them feel guilty. If they can’t come home, keep the card light and loving. “We’ll miss you” is fine; “Christmas is ruined” isn’t.

Give them a memory. A Christmas from their childhood that they might have forgotten. You were there for all of them.

For a card going the other way, see our page of notes for Mom, Dad and parents far away. And for lines in every other tone, our main collection of card messages has many more.

Our Cosy Classics collection (a lighthouse keeper’s cottage under a full moon, a stone cottage at dusk, a robin on a gate) has no country attached, which suits a son or daughter who has made a home somewhere new.

Questions

Should I send one card to my son and his wife, or two?

One card to the couple is usual. Address it to both by name, and if you’d like, add a line just for each of them inside.

What do I write to my child when they can’t come home for Christmas?

Something warm, with no guilt attached: that you understand, that you’ll miss them, and a plan for the next time you’ll see them. A detail from home helps too, the tree, the snow, the dog asleep by the fire.

Is it all right to send an ecard to my grown-up child?

Yes. An animated card can go by email, or as a link in a text, wherever they live, and you can schedule it for a date you choose. Many parents send a card like this and a parcel in the post.